My heart is so broken. It was 7 weeks ago today that Lily became an angel. Today Lane Goodwin (thumbs up for Lane-had childhood cancer) became an angel. There are three new babies being buried next to Lily in one week- this week. I learned of another Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome (HLHS) Mom that lost her sweet baby this week.
I feel so sad for the parents whose hearts were shattered before
mine and after mine. No one should ever have to watch their child die or get the call that their child died. You want to do everything you can to protect your children and when this happens.. You just feel so helpless and heart broken. Enough is enough.
Close your eyes and imagine the person you care most about (or one of many people or your favorite animal even because maybe you don't have kids or maybe one of your parents) becomes sick.. The doctors come to you and say.. It doesn't look good.. What do you want to do? Are you ready to let them go? Imagine this is real.. Imagine how it would feel. You then either hold them while they slip away or just watch them slip from you.. You watch them gasp as they take their last breath.. all while you watch helpless... It's your worst nightmare.. They're gone.. It hurts to breathe.. You can't believe it..
Now open your eyes.. If it hasn't really happened then treasure every moment that you still have with those you love. You are forever loved Lily Grace!! Rest in Peace Lane and all of the other sweet children losing their battles too..
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Written October 14th on Lily's Facebook page....
This is in regards to yesterday and last night (the post I wrote here on October 13th). I did have a hard night last night and I guess that was evident by my post. Shortly after I wrote that I decided to just go outside and sit in my back yard to just have a break by myself. M
Close your eyes and imagine the person you care most about (or one of many people or your favorite animal even because maybe you don't have kids or maybe one of your parents) becomes sick.. The doctors come to you and say.. It doesn't look good.. What do you want to do? Are you ready to let them go? Imagine this is real.. Imagine how it would feel. You then either hold them while they slip away or just watch them slip from you.. You watch them gasp as they take their last breath.. all while you watch helpless... It's your worst nightmare.. They're gone.. It hurts to breathe.. You can't believe it..
Now open your eyes.. If it hasn't really happened then treasure every moment that you still have with those you love. You are forever loved Lily Grace!! Rest in Peace Lane and all of the other sweet children losing their battles too..
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Written October 14th on Lily's Facebook page....
This is in regards to yesterday and last night (the post I wrote here on October 13th). I did have a hard night last night and I guess that was evident by my post. Shortly after I wrote that I decided to just go outside and sit in my back yard to just have a break by myself. M
y 6 year old daughter Makayla decided to join me. She asked if I was crying so I told her yes, that I just really missed Lily. So she then asked me to play hopscotch- we did and it was a fun distraction. Then I talked to her about how Lily is one of the stars above. So we tried to decide if she was the brightest star or if she was one of the lighter stars- there were so many light stars that I said it could be Lily and all of her friends watching over us.
Makayla then asked me if I wish I could have fixed Lily. I said yes.. I do wish that. I said "Do you Makayla?" and she said.. yes.. of course that is why I asked you. :) That made me laugh. Then Makayla told me "Mommy, I am not sad on the outside right now but I am sad on the inside". This time outside was really peaceful and stress free. It was great. Then I went inside and watched Modern Family which made me laugh. Crazy though that the 2 episodes that we watched were about a character being pregnant, a newborn baby class, decided if a vasectomy should be done or if they should have more kids, and I totally forgot that the little girl was named Lily. It was okay though because of my time outside.. Have a good night everyone
Makayla then asked me if I wish I could have fixed Lily. I said yes.. I do wish that. I said "Do you Makayla?" and she said.. yes.. of course that is why I asked you. :) That made me laugh. Then Makayla told me "Mommy, I am not sad on the outside right now but I am sad on the inside". This time outside was really peaceful and stress free. It was great. Then I went inside and watched Modern Family which made me laugh. Crazy though that the 2 episodes that we watched were about a character being pregnant, a newborn baby class, decided if a vasectomy should be done or if they should have more kids, and I totally forgot that the little girl was named Lily. It was okay though because of my time outside.. Have a good night everyone
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